Let’s recap, briefly, from part one of this post. I closed with the following bullet points, which I will address here one by one:
1) Being a veteran does not make you more qualified than a civilian for ANY job with similar but non-military qualifications.
2) If you think “they aren’t a vet they just don’t understand” that is a problem, especially if it is in relation to a job.
3) The fact that someone did NOT join the military has no impact on who they are. It wasn’t the path for everyone, and that is ok.
4) There are ~350 million people in the United States. There are ~1.3m service members and ~20m veterans. It is not the job of civilians to assimilate to you or to understand your unique background; it is up to you to help them understand where you came from and assimilate into civilian society.
I could go on and on about this, but let’s talk about each of these points briefly.
Point one: I get it, you are a vet, you have a very strong set of skills that the military taught you and you are ready to leverage those for a career outside the military. However, just being a vet does not make you qualified and, with that, if you are qualified just being a vet coupled with that qualification doesn’t mean you are the best person in the room for the job.
Point two: A veteran page that I follow on Instagram recently posted a video related to the founder of the page and his service. It has been nearly 10 years since this individual served and nearly died on the battlefield. The quote he had about that service rings very true to me and I hope it will for you all as well, “Talking about what I did in the military 10 years removed is like talking about that touchdown I made in high school football 20 years ago, it is irrelevant”.
Again, this is not to say you cannot be proud, you cannot wear your service like a badge of honor, but the moment that service creates a feeling of superiority between you and the rest of the population it becomes a problem.
I have fallen trap to this many times. I have caught myself thinking, “They have no idea what I have done, what I have been through, blah blah blah.” Because that is just what it is, blah blah blah. No one cares that you were a Colonel five years ago. No one cares how many combat patrols you went on. People will care what you are doing now. How have you continued to better yourself and continued to grow? What are you doing now that is building upon your service rather than just resting on it?
I turned down a job once exactly for this reason. The culture of the company was one where individuals never really took off their rank or attitudes. I was regularly met with “when I was the C.O. of unit X we did it like this” or “back on deployment”…these comments are hollow; they bring someone back to resting on old laurels. Sweet you were the CO of a battalion, squadron, regiment, etc. but what do you bring to the table now?
I catch myself pretty quickly now if I feel myself resting back on my military successes and try and snap out of that thought process of thinking.
Point three: Not everyone’s path leads them to the military. In fact, mine was very circuitous. I joined the Marines in college on a whim with no idea what I was getting into. Had one of hundreds if not thousands of little things gone slightly different I would have never been brought to the Marines.
So, stop assuming that someone who didn’t serve didn’t want to or didn’t feel the need. They may have no idea what the military is even about and that is OK. We are not our grandparents generation (during which serving was an expectation) and we should stop comparing ourselves to them. It was a different time and a different country back then.
Point four: If you walk into a social setting, work setting, job interview, just in your daily life and think that all these people need to understand who you are because you are a vet you are misguided.
For the most part we all are looking to leave service and enter the civilian world. A small portion of us are going to continue to serve in various governmental roles, or with contractors where you really do blur the line between military and civilian. I’m not talking about those people, that is a different game and beyond the scope of what The Hired Veteran is trying to accomplish.
I am talking to those who have left the military behind to search for a new opportunity. Those that have taken off the uniform forever because we wanted a change. For that group you need to really understand that it is not up to the rest of the population to understand you, it just isn’t…sorry.
It is up to you to become a part of the rest of the population. We need to stop seeing what we did as “special” or “unique”. It certainly can be described by those words but so can the sacrifice of ER nurses and doctors, first responders, teachers, those who volunteer their time to help others.
We need to stop seeing ourselves as something separate from the rest of society and become something that is part of society. So in the job interview when you get asked;
“So after so long in a job where you can just order people around how do you think you will adjust to that not being the case?”
You can shrug it off and become part of the society you are trying to join in the first place. We are all one country and even though your service is part of your being don’t make it something that prevents you from getting your next job and being happy outside of the military.